Getting Used to Reality (ii)

I have written before of things that I do not want to get used to. I wrote there:

I am trying not to become insensitive to my reality, especially when my reality is a dream.

Along those lines, here are 10 more things I'd like not to get used to.....

1. My wife's support in general and about our aliyah in particular (as I wrote before, she is in America now!)
2. Taxi drivers who do not appear to be shomer Shabbat (though looks are deceiving) wishing me a "Shabbat Shalom" or "Shavua Tov."
3. Doing shmira (guard duty) in shul and in the city/village where we live and remembering why there is a need in the first place to do shmira (guard duty) in shul and in the city/village where we live.
4. Reading the Chumash or the Navi about cities in Israel and knowing where they are and/or having visited their recently.
5. Old pictures or videos of the early chalutzim in their quest to build the Land of Israel while fighting off Arabs, Turks, and malaria.
6. Seeing a Jewish soldier with Hebrew "Tza'hal" on the uniform. (I served in the I.D.F. when I was younger and will be called up to reserve duty early next year (they have not called me this year!) and I sometimes still get emotional when I see a soldier!)
7. Seeing an Ethiopian soldier (what an incredible realization of kibbutz galiyot in one snapshot!).
8. Learning Torah in Hebrew (Lashon Hakodesh!)
9. Talking Hebrew (Lashon Hakodesh!)
10. Being able to visit the Kotel (Western Wall) almost whenever I want.

More to follow in future posts.

Salute to Israel Parade – Responses ii

I have still been thinking a lot about my post and, specifically, maayan's reply about "fluff."

The short version of my response is this: "I agree. Point well taken."

Now for the longer version.....

I seem to remember a story - I think it's about David Brenner (Rabbi Fleischmann, is it in his autobiography, Soft Pretzels with Mustard which I think you quoted here....?). The story is about a protestor at a poorly-attended rally. Some passerby jeered him by saying, "Do you really think you're going to change the world??"

Brenner replied, "I'm not trying to change the world. I am just making sure that the world does not change me."

I am sure you remember the huge rally in support of Israel in Washington D.C. a few years back (was it in May or June of 2002?). Literally thousands and thousands of Jews from all over the world came to Washington to express support for Israel. Our school sent many busses and each faculty member was in charge of a different bus. Our bus got there a bit late and the kids didn't see or hear any of the speakers. We just stood there in the sun, not sure what to do. I remember telling them that the point of the rally, first and foremost, was to show support. Politicians and reporters count people and they don't really care if we heard Netanyahu speak. They care that we were there. In some respects, we went there just for that one aerial photograph or that one line in the papers that read, "250,000 people came out in support of...." Despite spending 10 times more time on the bus than we did at the rally, the kids felt that they accomplished something. And they did.

The truth of the matter is that no one has any way to know whether the rally changed the geopolitical landscape in the Middle East. We hope it did, but it's hard to imagine that any one event or rally can changed thousands of years of animosity and unrest. But there is no question that the rally changed everyone there. The act of going, of giving up a day, of walking in the heat, of seeing the sea of busses, of standing shoulder to shoulder with Jews (and probably non-Jews) of all stripes focused on one goal.... that's not fluff. That's real change.

There is no question: going to rallies, participating in letter-writing campaigns, lobby trips to D.C., etc. changes the person/people involved. I said it in my post but perhaps not strongly enough (and the "Blah blah blah" didn't help clarify my point!): I know that people are changed by participating in the parade. I would go if I were there as I have for the past many years. My kids benefited, the people around me benefited... I benefited!

So I accept the point that you all made: much if not all of the parade is for the people who participated.

My post was from the other perspective, that is from the perspective of a new oleh going through a rough time of acclimation who didn't have the luxury to be inspired by the 100,000 or so marchers, banners, floats, etc. It was hard and it's still hard and that's where I was coming from.

On the other hand, we read Parshat Shlach this week in Israel; perhaps this is not the best time to talk about the hard stuff.

Thanks again to all.

Salute to Israel Parade – Responses

As expected, my last post drew some criticism. For a blog that is barely read and even less commented upon, 5 posts that ranged from critical to disapproving to supportive is a lot. I thank the people that read it and the people who commented. Even grovepark who was "offended by this post" responded and did so politely. Libby Bamizrach said "...your honesty was refreshing, your emotions totally understood..."

I know you're not happy with the content of the post, but I thank you all for understanding where it came from.

Remember, I was the one who said in the post that it would be "obnoxious" and a "vent" which would be "emotional" and "irrational."

Still, I wrote it so I should respond.

I think efrat hit it on the head: "I'm so sorry that you are having a difficult time of things right now. It sounds like you are very frustrated with your situation." As they say in Hebrew, "ein safek" (no doubt). It's tough to make aliyah. There are a lot of very, very difficult things to contend with. There is no question that my rant was due in large part to the difficulties I am experiencing now.

Grovepark wrote: "How long have you lived in Israel, M-D?" (Answer: Ten months.) Have you forgotten all of the difficulties of contemplating making aliyah?"

No. In my post, I wrote: "I know that not everyone who wants to make aliyah actually can. For more than 2 decades I participated in the parade with a little sour taste left in my mouth saying, “Maybe this is the year....” and I am certain that many people did the same this year. I know that I am blasting good, hard-working people who have hearts in the right place" It may not have sounded like it, but I know exactly what it feels like. I was the one, at our going-away party last summer no less, who told a couple who expressed feelings of guilt for not moving to Israel, the same point that efrat made, "Also, if the 10%, 20% or 30% of the crowd, that you suggest, moves to Israel and they do not have a way to support themselves once there, that would be hugely taxing on the system.."

There are a few things that I must accept and agree with in your comments:

1) Grovepark and Libby Bamizrach both talked about the effect the parade has on non-observant people too. That is a point very well taken; my parochial perspective got the best of me and I accept fully that critique.

2) Another fair critique is this: efrat wrote, " Maybe you could do something about getting the word out Israeli T.V. and radio. I would think that seeing 100,000 people gathering for the State of Israel would give many there happiness and strength!" Point well taken.

3) Libby Bamizrach and grovepark both wrote that part of the parade's value is on the kids and the community in general. I agree 100% and I even wrote it in the post:

"The marchers and viewers themselves should get recharged in their love and support for Israel. They may not all be able to move here, but it’s still nice to know they’re there."

But maybe I didn't write it strongly enough.

I thought a lot about Libby Bamizrach's question, "Just out of curiosity, if you came back for a visit would you go to the parade?" Let me answer a different question first. If I, for whatever reason, moved back to America, would I attend the parade? Definitely yes. For the reasons that you and I wrote: I would go for me, for my kids, for my school, for my community. I would go to remind myself that I should be in Israel. That I am proud of the people there. (I would also go for the reasons that hajew said, such as "reunion of old friends..." etc. But that's a different story.) I would go if I lived there. I would go if I visited.

But that doesn't make me regret my post. I wrote from me and for me. I wrote from the heart: I am where I am (both physically and emotionally) and I am who I am. What I wrote came from who I am. Hajew wrote that we're all entitled to an opinion and what's an opinion worth if it doesn't come from within even if we're not proud of it. I cannot apologize for that even if it offends.

So, the bottom line is this: I thank you for your comments (and prayers) and, as I said, I accept much of the critique. Still, I cannot apologize for my emotions. They most certainly come from the emotional state that I'm in now and it is probably not completely coherent, cogent or rational.

There is no question that my last post was an emotional, slightly immature look at the Parade. But I think that one of the beautiful aspects of a blog - and people in general who respect each other - is that you can write from the heart and the gut.

Thanks for letting me.

Salute to Israel Parade

[Note: If you are not from New York and/or you are not familiar with the Salute to Israel Parade, look here or here for some background.]

Another of the many advantages to writing an anonymous blog, is that I can be obnoxious and/or I can vent (often the two occur simultaneously!) without inhibitions or fear of repercussions..... even if I know I’m wrong.

So here goes.....

I have been marching or attending the Salute to Israel parade for many years. I did it single, I did it with my wife; I did it with my children. I’ve worn the t-shirts, and the buttons and the stickers and, yes, the blue and white makeup. I’ve cheered and yelled and had many, many great memories from it.

It’s an important event for a lot of reasons. Off the top of my head (and briefly):

1) the world should know that thousands and thousands of Jews and non-Jews support Israel.

2) The above sentence could also be said about politicians, other Jews, other non-Jews, Israelis, Israeli politicians, etc.: They all should know too that thousands and thousands of Jews and non-Jews support Israel.

3) The marchers and viewers themselves should get recharged in their love and support for Israel. They may not all be able to move here, but it’s still nice to know they’re there.

Having said all that - and I believe it all wholeheartedly - and knowing the importance of the parade and all of the hard work that went into it, I had a different take on the parade this year. In short, my feelings were: blah blah blah.

Yes. I said it. Blah blah blah.

No one besides my wife told me (without me mentioning it first) that the parade was going on. No Israeli that I know even knows that there is, was, or will be a parade! On page 3 of the Jerusalem Post there was a picture with no accompanying article with a blurb which said something about Mayor Bloomberg and Hillary Clinton and I can’t remember who else. That’s it. No more exposure that I know of.

Blah blah blah.

And here’s the obnoxious part which I’ll regret in the morning: if even 10% of the people participating in the parade made aliyah this summer, imagine the impact it would have on the economy, the demographics, on history! Maybe the schools would become better; maybe the roads would become safer; maybe our sons could serve less time in the army in general and less time patrolling dangerous zones in particular; maybe people who do make aliyah would be able to pay their bills easier; maybe politicians would respond more to the people who continue to inject this beautiful country with life and manpower and brainpower and, yes, with dollars.

And if 20% of the people made Aliyah!? Or 30%!? The parade website says that 100,000 people march in the parade! If 30,000 people moved to Israel (the math doesn't even include the spectators!)... wow! Maybe things could really be different here.

If even some of the money that was spent on t-shirts, transportation, secirity, sponsors, etc. came to Israel... imagine the impact!

I know that not everyone who wants to make aliyah actually can. For more than 2 decades I participated in the parade with a little sour taste left in my mouth saying, “Maybe this is the year....” and I am certain that many people did the same this year. I know that I am blasting good, hard-working people who have hearts in the right place. But still, I cannot help but feel that it was just a lot of fluff. Sorry.

Blah blah blah.

I got a call from a friend who was at the parade screaming on the phone because the background noise was so loud. His first question, “I’m at the parade. Is it on the news in Israel?”

Huh?

(I don’t have a TV, but the answer was no anyway!).

My first reaction to his question was, “I don’t know, I am too busy helping my daughter with her algebra homework.... in Hebrew.... and navigating the phone system at the Office of Collections.... in Hebrew.... so I can pay our mortgage on time with funds we barely have. In short, I’m too busy living in Israel to watch people in America show support for us.”

But I didn’t say any of that. I just said, “No.” Short and to the point.

Maybe I should have been short and to the point on this post too.

It’s hard to deny emotions. Even if they’re irrational.

Oh well.

Blah blah blah.

When I have Time I'll...... (Avot 2:5)

I have been meaning to write about:

- my responses to some comments made about my Yom Yerushalayim post.

- more Yom Yerushalayim thoughts, experiences, etc.
- Shavuot in Israel

- the Salute to Israel Parade in New York this past Sunday (I think I'll still write about that one)

- a cab driver that taught me about the "have's" and the "have-nots"

Life happens fast. I have not had the time that I've wanted to think, reflect and write about the things that are going on.

A comment I made on Rabbi Neil Fleischmann's blog sums up my feelings about this time problem in a different way. See my comment here and Rabbi Fleishmann's response here (at the end).

Sorry. I'll try to get back in soon.